"A Hundred Summers" by Beatriz Williams

How Did I Hear About This Book?

I was browsing for some good Mexico beach reads this Spring and thought this might be a viable option based on the fact that it mentioned Dartmouth (where my grandma worked for many years), the Atlantic ocean that my mom and grandma love so much, and the 30's. 

Looks like a great beach read! (Source credit: http://kindlesandwine.com/2013/12/17/review-interview-giveaway-a-hundred-summers-by-beatriz-williams/)

About the Author

Beatriz Williams is a Stanford graduate who spent several years in New York and London while getting her feet wet in writing fiction part time. She now lives near the Connecticut shore with her husband and four children while continuing to pump out new best sellers, including her newest called "The Secret Life of Violet Grant".

Overview 

It's the summer of 1938 and Lilly is forced to face her past at her family's beach home in Seaview, RI. So much for sun in the fun while you are forced to watch your ex-fiance and childhood friend hop around in newlywed bliss.

Fun fun, 1930's beach novel! (Picture source credit: oops)

The book takes you between two times, 1938 at the beach and 1931 when Lilly meets the love of her life, and helps her unravel how things went so wrong...and if she can ever be happy again.

Did You Like the Book?  

I'm just going to come out and say it; holy sh*t  it was awful and at multiple point I said things out loud like "Really?!" and at the end I started audibly laughing. While I was okay with the cheesy love story, the East Coast social club house scene, and the anti-Jewish sentiments in the upper class as WWII approached, the ending was the final poo icing on this crap cake. 

What I thought I was in for. (Photo source credit: http://woodstockwardrobe.com/page/9/) 

So that you don't even THINK about reading it, I'm going to tell you the ending because it's that bad. The day after the love birds reignite their flame after seven years apart, Lilly (shy socialite) and Nick (Dartmouth QB) decide that they have to be together, even in the wakes of him being forced into being married to her best friend through a rather manipulative plan. 

Then, when he drives to confront his crazy, money and attention grubbing wife and Lilly gets a big heart about saving her best friend (who's a monster) a huge hurricane rips through Seaside and kills all of the characters that were inconvenient to her Nick and Lilly's plot line of having three children and a beach house happy ending on the sunset. Which is exactly what happened. 

What I actually got...a feeling sorry for herself society girl and a college QB with dreams of not being part of his dad's successful broker business (BUT I WANT TO FOLLOW MY DREAMS AS AN ARCITECT DAD!). (Photo source credit: http://artcontrarian.blogspot.com/2012_07_01_archive.html)

They wrap up the story with her popping out three little rug rats with him, and then the author has the kahonas to end with a scene where she's having a day on the beach with her kids nine months pregnant with her favorite sassy socialite Aunt, to when her surprise, her true love Nick arrive home from WWII after bravely volunteering to go off to help his country.

Well Isn't There a Silver Lining? 

Yes, there is. I learned about the 1938 Hurricane that really did strike the East Coast, specifically Rhode Island and Connecticut. This little history nugget toward my infinite search for new useless crap to learn about made this terrible time spent worth it.

Watch Hill, RI  is about 7 miles from where Napatree Point was located. Napatree Point is the area the fictional town of "Seaside" was based on. (Source Picture Credit: http://www.beatrizwilliams.com/about-A-HUNDRED-SUMMERS/the-1938-hurricane-in-pictures)

If you'd like to learn more about the hurricane of 1938, which created waves of up to 25 ft and winds up to 100 mph, here's a few good resources I came across: 

1.) http://www.beatrizwilliams.com/about-A-HUNDRED-SUMMERS/the-1938-hurricane-in-pictures

2.) http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1938_New_England_hurricane

3.) http://www.weather.gov/box/1938hurricane

Kids Say the Darndest Things

Kids say the dardnest things.  While this one isn't so much of a "oh that's so cute" thing, it's more along the lines of "girlfriend, you have no idea".

In Northern Minnesota over Labor Day weekend we were told of the most amazing sandy beach, recommended by our front desk clerk.  A beach where all of the summer resort employees and locals go about 20 minutes away.  Yes please!  That's the one I want!  Screw the tourist shenannigans.

While relaxing in the shallow water I noticed (hard not to) my husbands visually appalling feet.  I find they represent hard work and being outside a lot in the summer, but, I'm sure others would be more inclined to describe them differently.  As we were in shallow water on a 100% sand beach I scooped up some wet sand, put it on his feet and told him to rub his feet with it. And here comes the choir:

Dialog:
Eight year old girl (who doesn't think we can hear her 15 feet away): "Ewwwww!  That's disgusting!"

My initial reaction was "Yeah, feet are disgusting.." then I realized it.  She was freaked out by the wet sand!  While I could have explained this on the beach to her, to avoid confronting a child in a public place and her mother calling the cops, I thought my message would be better represented in a letter to her on my blog.

Letter 
From: Ann Marie 
To: Eight Year Old Girl Who Things Sand On Feet is Disgusting

Dearest grasshopper with so much more to learn,

So you think that sand on feet is disgusting, huh?  Girlfriend, you're in for a big shock about the real world.  In less than 10 years from now you'll likely be asked a question that will define your arrival into womanhood, "Would you like a deluxe pedicure or just the regular?".  You will answer "Deluxe".  Because damnit, you deserve it.

Then, not only will they slop wet sand on your feet.  They will proceed to slop warm mud on your feet and legs, vicariously shred the bottom and sides of your feet with a tool (that I'm still not entirely convinced isn't a kitchen microplane at some spa locations) and nine times out of ten, burn your feet and legs with those too damn hot towels.

So, the next time you go into that spa you'll tell yourself "I'm not going to get the deluxe pedicure.  I came in here for the $22 midweek pedicure and by god that's what I'm walking out with".  The thing is, you're wrong.  They will ask the age-old question mid way through (what you indicated was a regular pedicure in the beginning), "Would you like a deluxe pedicure or just the regular?".  They will always make you feel like a second class citizen with the infliction in their voice when they ask, to make you feel JUST crappy enough about your life outside of those walls to get the answer that they want.  Then this game will go on, year after year.  Deluxe pedicure after deluxe pedicure.

The best part  is they're not only are they throwing sand and mud on your feet and shredding your feet with kitchen utensil, they're also charging $10 extra to do it each time.

So, hopefully when your day to become a woman is upon you, you will be wise and brave enough to have the same response today on the beach of "Ewwwwwwww!!! That's disgusting!" and save yourself hundreds of dollars over the course of your adult life.

Best of luck, you'll need it.

- Ann Marie

Kitchen Microplane

Foot Microplane, can you see my confusion???

I'm back! But where have I been? Why now?

Q: "Why didn't you blog for soooo long?!".

A: "Ummm...two things."

Q: "Why get back into it now?"
A: "Easy, football season."

While the answers aren't very interesting, it came down to those three things: life, technology and football.

Life & Technology

Here's the background.  I've been working in software sales for nearly two years now.  It's the most fulfilling job I've every had, and the best company I've ever worked for...and is an opportunity of a lifetime.  While it sounds a little cheesy, every week I'm challenged mentally and the people around me are some of the quickest and most talented I've ever worked with.

Just a typical Thursday at my desk, with one of my talented team nehhhhhs.

But we're always "on", even though it's not a requirement.  Everyone has an iPhone, iPad and MacBook, literally.  While we're not required to respond to emails or always be "on", you don't want to let your team or customers down.  Well, last year I found myself checking emails when I normally wouldn't have, responding to requests well after 9:00 at night and making work phone calls while in the car with my family.

Then it started.  The dog got depressed when he saw me pull the computer out and my response time to the husband's questions were delayed and often half baked because of doing two (or five) things at once.  Then the guilt kicked in and it was time.  I deliberately stopped bringing my computer home after work last winter. Admittedly I still checked Facebook, cruised online and read on my Kindle...but work emails, blogging (and anything requiring a keyboard) waited.

Mom, put the computer down and take me outside! Even if it's snowing in May!

In short, it's known disconnecting from technology after work is beneficial, and I've been trying over the last year to get better about it.  Because I do NOT want to be one of those people addicted to their smartphone that live for picture to post to Facebook and Twitter (instead of the actual moments).

While I had a lot less to blog about because I wasn't snapping pictures or being obsessed about taking notes while out to dinner, it was a great reality check on what's important, and based on my other obligations, blogging did not make the list at that time.  But why am I picking the baton back up if I had such a great time fully engaged in real life?  

Living in the moment....hotdog leg style.

Football

NFL football is why I'm back to blogging.  For the next 17 weeks have all day Sunday, Monday nights (and for half the season) Thursday nights of quality time to myself (outside of when the Packers play).

Thanks for understanding everyone!  

While my posts may not be as detailed as they have been in the past, I'm going to do my best to provide my readers (by readers I mean my family...literally) with some exciting adventures, misadventures, commentaries and reviews in the coming weeks!  Thanks everyone!

PS: To the best of my knowledge and records, I've updated my 2012-2013 reading list.  While there aren't full reviews, feel free to check the updated list out!

"Raving Fan" of Audible

For two years, 1.5 hours of my day were filled with: idiot drivers, post snow storm rush hour traffic, BMW drivers that thought they owned the road, white knuckles, a clenched jaw, and a rather well exercised middle finger.  Because of this commute, those of you that knows me well, knows that this is how I learned to love me some Audible.

Well, since my commute has been cut down dramatically...so has my audiobook time.  Which is clearly good and bad.  It's now gotten to the point where I've reached my max in roll over Audible credits, and am making sometimes unwise choices about purchasing audiobooks when I need to burn credits.

Crap...I need to burn some of these credits! 

So as I was going to explore my options to cancel on the site, I came across something that quickly changed my mind and reminded me again as to how I originally fell in love with Audible.com.  Their stellar as hell customer service, great pricing for members, and shockingly fair and logical policies.

This makes way too much sense to have no "gotchas", right? 

Oh yeah, and there is a phone number that you can actually call and talk to a person about getting your credit back on the the audiobook that you don't like!  At anytime!  

Talk to a real, live, person?  Anytime?  Can it be true?

What's even crazier is that it all worked like they said it would.  

I called the number above at 9:00 PM CST.  A live person picked up.  I talked to them about how disappointed in myself I was about over-committing to the Game of Thrones series (and sounded like a crazy cat lady)...and that I wanted to know if I would be able to trade books 2, 3 and 4 in for other books.  They said "absolutely", let me know that the books would no longer be in my library, that I would be seeing credits on my account and we cordially parted ways.  Then as soon as I got off the phone I refreshed my browser...and it was already done!  The credits had been applied to my account within seconds.  

Honestly, how can I unsubscribe when I have an experience like that?  I just won't do it.

Moral of the story: If all of the places people spent their hard earned money had customer service like this, the world would be a much happier place.  

Extreme Makeover: Entertainment Room

Blah.  That was the feeling that came over me when I thought of our downstairs.

Ever since Adam removed the sports memorabilia on the walls, they have stood naked.  It's been over five years since the walls were painted, they have lived through many roommate moves and there was enough tan in that room to make even Snooki jealous.

Tan couch, tan wall, wood built ins, wood trim...make it stop already!

Don't mind my little helper.

When I asked Adam about re-doing the downstairs after he removed his sports stuff, he told me that I couldn't paint, but that I could decorate the walls.  Well, quite frankly, the walls were what killed me the most.  No matter how many times I begged, the answer was still "no" week after week.  So what does one do in that situation?

Then the light bulb went off.  Well, as long as Adam wasn't the one that had to paint...then it was probably alright.  Right?  So why not just wait until he's out of town and then re-do the whole downstairs?  He'll be so happy that he didn't have to do anything...and he'll love it!  Can you tell that I'm a newly wed yet?

In the weeks following up to his trip I picked up ideas on Pintrest, made a list of "to do" bought some things off of Etsy, made some trips to Home Goods and made my final stop at Target and Home Depot.  

I might have done a project management course or two in my day...

Then the weekend came.  Instead of leaving on Friday he announced the night before that he wasn't leaving until Saturday morning and was coming back on Sunday afternoon.  This put a HUGE wrench in my plans, as you can see from my timeline.  

But, good thing I have great friends! While this wasn't the original intention of my friends coming over, Terren and Amber saved the day.  We got the room painted by the time we went to bed Saturday night and decorations hung on Sunday morning.  Only thing left was "the big reveal" to Adam!  I was so excited! 

Here's how it went: 

Adam arrives home, hungover with 4-6 hours of sleep.  

Ann Marie:  "I want to show you the crafts that me and Wallace did this weekend!".  

Adam: "Sounds great! I know you were excited to decorate for Christmas!"

We walk downstairs

Ann Marie: "Tah dah!!!"

Adam: Looks around with a serious look on his face,  "What did you do?"

Ann Marie: "Do you like it?"

Adam:  "Didn't I tell you not to paint?  I hate the color.", turns around, shakes head, walks back upstairs and takes a shower.

Now that went well (NOT).  The good news is, after the hangover wore off he admitted he liked it and was very happy with what we had done.  While next time I will consult with the other half about large design decisions before making them, this time, it turned out great!

Tah dah!  Oh wait, you hate it?  Oh, fabulous. 

Purchased a large stencil to stencil the backdrop of the book shelf and a pillow case to match, with Martha Stewart gold paint

Lamp, shade, frame, and bookshelf from Target.  You can see the stenciling a little better here.  The Christmas decor is from antique shopping in St. Cloud.  

Frames and TV tray from Target, prints from Dizzy Rhino Designs, has a store on Etsy

And they lived happily ever after in their new entertainment room..luckily!

Homemade Basic Potato Soup

I openly admit it and everyone close to me knows it.  I have a soup addiction.  This time of year is always quite difficult for me.  Especially when it snows.  Being trapped in our house with heavy snow falling outside, with the temptation of homemade soup is like brining an alcoholic to an all-you-can-drink New Year's party.  It's just not a good place for me.  With the 15+ inches we got this weekend, I did what I do best.  I made WAY too much soup.

Snow = Soup, Soup = Leftover, Leftovers = Wallace's Favorite

What I'm sharing below is by no means a perfectly measured recipe.  But in order to be a become a good cook, you need to taste your food.  Which is highly encourage towards the end of this recipe.  Also, this is "pick your own adventure" base soup that can be made to include your personal favorites from the list below.

Basic Potato Soup
Serves 8
Print a copy of this recipe here

Ingredients
4 medium russet potatoes, peeled and cut into 1 inch cubes
5 strips of bacon, diced
8 TBSP butter
Flour
10 cups milk
2 TBSP dry sherry
Chicken bouillon - to taste
Salt - to taste
Pepper - to taste

Choose your adventure options:
Onion (cook with roux), frozen corn, frozen peas, cubes of ham, frozen broccoli, shredded parmesan, shredded cheddar, green onions, dill, parsley

Directions

1. In a small pan, fry bacon until brown and crispy.  Reserve grease and bacon bits.
2. In the bottom of a large pot, melt the butter at medium heat.  When melted, gradually add flour one tablespoon at a time, while whisking continuously to create a roux.  Shouldn't need more than 6-8 TBSP of flour but may vary slightly.  Your end roux should look like the picture below.
3. One cup at a time, add milk and whisk.  
4. Add potatoes, bacon, bacon grease, dry sherry, salt and pepper.  Don't over do the salt at this point since you can always add it at the end.  Cook on medium heat for 20-30 minutes until you can easily stab the potatoes with a fork.  
5. Add your "adventure" options.  I usually do the following (corn and cheddar) or (peas and parmesan).  Cook until all ingredients are warm.  
6. Garnish and serve!

Here is a picture of what your goal roux should look like

Potato soup with peas, green onions and parsley

"Outlander" by Diana Gabaldon

Where Did I Find This?
I found out about the Outlander series from an old coworker of mine, Stephanie.  Since we have a similar taste in books and love for historic fiction, I knew I had to check it out.

What is the Book About?
Outlander is the first of seven novels under the same name.  Claire Randall and her husband Frank retreat to the Scottish highland in order to rekindle their marriage after being separated for years by World War II.  Frank, being a history professor, is excited to learn more about his ancestral roots linked to the area.

With Frank is occupied with old paperwork and dusty bookshelves, Claire decides to go and check out Craigh na Dun, a group of old standing stones, to find a rare flower that she is interested in.  While it's rumored to have been linked to mysterious powers and pagan rituals, who can really believe all of that?

While collecting the plant specimens, Claire starts to feel dizzy.  When she fully wakes, things look the same but different.  The landscape looks strange. Then, the people that she meets in the next hour spin her life in a completely different direction than what she was intending.  In the year 1743, 200 years before the morning that she had woken up from.

Would You Recommend it to Others? 
When I was about half of the way through the novel I recommended it to my grandma.  The woman might be a Catholic saint but I knew that she read novels that had a little bit of romance smut in them.  Right up her alley!

Then it happened about 3/4 of the way through.  Think sadistic, torture, disgusting...and the whole thing was totally unnecessary for me.  In a shocking turn of events, it was no longer grandma appropriate.  I told her at Thanksgiving NOT to get it!  When she asked what it was, I told her that it was too gross to even explain.

I did enjoy the following:

• The characters
• Bits of historic information
• Descriptions of Scotland in the 18th century
• The love and romance aspects

Liked it so much that I'm reading the second novel.  But, I'm having a hard time deciding if I'll be reading the third...and it all links back to the extremely dark scenes that surround a certain character.

So, while I want to recommend it, I'm just not sure it's possible because of the disturbingly graphic scenes.

Grand Theater, Wausau: Our Wedding Venue

This August we were married and I haven't shared anything about how it went on my blog yet!  So I thought I would do a few posts on some of the highlights and tips that I have for other brides planning their weddings.  First was the venue...and choosing a wedding venue was SUPER duper tough.

Adam and I both grew up in the country but we love our lifestyle in the Twin Cities.  So, picking a wedding venue back in Central Wisconsin was really difficult.  We wanted a vibe that we'd be able to find in Minneapolis but didn't want it to be so cutting edge that we scared our families and friends back home.

So after looking at a lot of expensive and boring bowling alleys, hotels and hall rentals decorated with antlers and cedar logs we had one last place to check out.  While we never knew anyone that's had a wedding there, we toured the ARTsblock/Grand Theater's "Great Hall" in downtown Wausau...and fell in love.

These pictures were taken by me when we were scoping out the location

For the first time throughout the whole venue search I could see myself in a wedding dress and could envision the starlit ceiling, the bar lit up with old neon and our guests hanging out on the patio, and the whole thing finally started came together.  In addition to their gorgeous backdrops, there were a few other things that made the decision easy for us:

• The staff was extremely accommodating and willing to work with all of my non-standard ideas and requests.
• The area around the Grand Theater is gorgeous.  Cobblestone streets, a park, a water fountain and a bright red British telephone booth...what more could you ask for?
• The Grand Theater allowed us to choose our caterer.  While they had a list of preferred vendors, they worked with us and were extremely flexible.  At many other venues you are given a limited list of choices (all of which are typically overpriced).  In those situations, they know that you have to choose one of them and are most times unwilling to negotiate pricing or work with you on a custom menu.
• You can choose your dessert.  You want an ice cream bar, cookie bar or brownie bar?  Great.  Also, you can choose who you want to cater it.  No cake cutting fees or any of that shenannigans that couples can get wrapped up in.
• Reasonable alcohol prices.  There were other places that wanted to charge us nearly $4/glass when you take gratuity into consideration, with no options for half barrels.  Based on the fact that we went through six half barrels that evening, and we had warned them that it could that or more, we're confident we made the right choice.
• We had a rain backup, since we were able to rent out the theater if we needed to with a few days advanced notice

Grand Theater's bathrooms, among many other things, are gorgeous!

The outdoor patio is fenced in and gives your guest a LOT of room to go outside .

So it was decided, the Grand Theater it was!  Now, how in the world am I going to do this?  Since I've never been to a wedding there...I had no ideas to work from and literally started from scratch, and only knew one thing...  DON'T FIGHT THE VENUE.  What I mean by that is:

• If there is a prevalent color, don't try to pretend it's not there or that you can cover it up
• If it has a certain style, don't try to pick something drastically different 
• If it has a certain aspect or flair, don't try to fight it
• If you don't like what it has to offer, then don't choose it

While I had originally imagined a rustic chic style wedding, that quickly changed when I saw the art deco elegance of the Grand Theater, and I decided not to fight it.  But instead flatter it.  Thus started my "art deco", "theater", "gold" and "1920's" wedding search.  Since I love that time period and musical theater, I decided to 100% embraced the direction that the venue was naturally drawing me towards.

In terms of the themed details, here were a few of my favorites I plan to talk about in other posts:

• Wedding Playbill
• Favorite Things Menu
• Cookie Cart
• Popcorn Bar
• Photo Booth

Here's a few of the details in pictures:

Can't wait to share more details in the next few weeks!  Here's the venue information in case you're interested in learning more.  

The Grand Theater
401 4th Street
Wausau, WI
54403

Website: http://www.grandtheater.org/
Great Hall Details: http://www.grandtheater.org/facilityrental/greathall.aspx
Theater Rental: http://www.grandtheater.org/facilityrental/grandtheater.aspx

Wedding Photos Taken at the Grand Theater:
M Photography
Carissa Christine Photography
The McCartneys
The McCartneys
The McCartneys

Restaurant Review Guideline and Ethics: It's Time

Earlier this week on his podcast, Andrew Zimmern gave his two cents about how much he dislikes Yelp, how it's on his "shit list" and why he feels that restaurant reviews should be left to the experts.  There is a summary of it here, and within his podcasts he goes onto mention that the site is dangerously unstable and that it gives a forum for uninformed morons to take down a restaurant.

After hearing this, I checked out a few of my favorite restaurants reviews on Yelp and shockingly, was appalled.  An alarming number of the people posting to my favorite restaurants were down right mean, biased, overly critical for no reason, and childish.  In short, Andrew was right.  There are a bunch of idiots out there taking down what have been, are, or could be successful restaurants.

While I agree with his frame of thought, I wasn't angry.  What I felt more than anything was disappointment and asked myself this question: if being part of a community website is a privilege, not a right, then why are we letting people like this ruin our community?

For example, check out some of the unclassy reviews from this "Elite Reviewer" who when reviewing a Jewish style deli, writes the following after having a four out of five star experience "Way to break the cheap Jewish stereotype with exemplary customer service" or comments about a waitstaff "staff who might as well be replaced by guard dogs or just goats".  Nearly everything that she wrote lacked class.

While I don't expect Urbanspoon, Yelp or any other community website to police every comment for their respective content guidelines since it's a totally unrealistic request,  I do expect more out of us.  As members of this community, we need to step up and start policing ourselves and keep it classy.

So listen up: foodies, casual restaurant goers, and 19 you year olds out there that know how to use the internet (but don't know your butt from a hole in the ground).  We're kicking it old school and bringing it back to the basics, with a set of restaurant review guidelines that we should all be able to pledge our allegiance to as functioning members of society.

As a responsible member of a community, when reviewing a business within the hospitality review website:

• Thou shall not write reviews online that thou would not say to the owner's face
• Thou shall not threaten nor extort a business in any manner
• Thou shall not add irrelevant content that won't affect a potential customer's experience
• Thou shall not only write about negative reviews if thou wants to be seen as credible
• Thou SHALL write reviews that thou would be proud to show thou's grandmother or boss
• Thou SHALL assume that thou's review is being viewed every time the business is searched for online
• Thou SHALL remember that service industry employees and business owners are people, that are part of families
• Thou SHALL be a good Samaritan and flag inappropriate reviews to keep thou's site clean of scum

While I know that the battle upon review websites has only begun, let's see what we can do to show the professional reviewers out there that we're not uninformed morons and that we can be responsible.  

As to those people that are uninformed and hateful morons... if they've proven that they're not capable of handling of the responsibilities and affects that the world wide web now offers...then let's ask that their irresponsible and potentially harmful reviews be removed. 

Well, now that we've had he pep talk...I leave you with two hilarious videos of real actors, reading real Yelp reviews and a story about a unique use of one restaurant's negative reviews:

Can you think of any guidelines that I've missed?  Do you think that I'm dead wrong?  If so, why?  Any thoughts on the issue?  

Your Name is Ann Marie Too? Wha?!

This is the story about last weekend, when I got to meet my blogging idol, The Pioneer Woman.

While Ree started out blogging and still does, she has also branched out a bit.  She now has multiple books that have been on the best-sellers list, has been featured and performed guest appearances on quite a few TV shows and now has her own Food Network Show.  Oh yeah, .and she's been challenged to (and won) a "Throwndown with Bobby Flay" which is what I'm most jealous of!

When I read on Twitter that she was coming to the Mall of America to do a book signing, I was beyond excited!  So I packed grabbed her cookbook, my iPad so that I could read while waiting (which I found out was dead in line---super), and ventured off to the MOA, where no sane Minnesotan goes from November-January.

While in line, since my iPad was dead, I compiled my list of things that I wanted to tell her.  As the hours rolled, by I got more excited by the minute to tell her all of these things cooking in my head:

1.) First, to ask if that is Marlboro Man watching over you, very husband-like, from the balcony? If so, when I get out of this line, do you think that he'll sign my cook book on the page that showcases his cowboy butt?  Is that weird?  Sorry...

Might not look like him in this photo, but, sure did in person...plus, the CASE hat had me wondering.

2.) Thank you for introducing me to hound dogs!  She was the person that got me to fall in love with hound dogs...and now I have one that she's signing a "Charlie and the Christmas Kitten" book for.  Yeah, I know that it's pathetic, I don't even want to hear about it.

3.) Thank you for running around field filled filled with poo to take pictures!  Sometimes her pictures of the farm life make me hurt for small town life (and even tear up on certain days when city life is really getting me down).  This country-girl-gone-city enjoys it more than you know!

3.) Thank you for introducing me to blogging!  I have been reading her blog since 2007 when I was forwarded a link to her "Black Heels to Tractor Wheels: A Love Story" series that she had written about how her and her husband met.  Which is now a published book and apparently is no longer posted on her website (tried to find today).

Back in 2007 I didn't know what blogging was and I sure has heck didn't know who these people were.  Yet, I found myself spending hours reading witty, quirky and funny commentary on things that I thoroughly enjoyed.  While it took me quite a few years to start, I ended up with one blog that I didn't like, and took over a year to establish  what I want to write about...I think that I've finally found my stride.  So, thank you for opening this door for me!

Now that you can see how excited I was to meet The Pioneer Woman, let's get back to last Sunday and all of these oozing compliments that I wanted to share with my idol.

She is probably the only thing that would get me into the Mall of America during this time of year.

Holy horse poo, I'm almost there!  There she is!

I made it!  It was my turn to tell Ree how great I think she is and ask my questions!  Here's how it went:

Ree: opens her cook book to page where my name is 
Ree: "You're name is Ann Marie?  Mine too!?"
Ann Marie: "Oh my gosh, I had no idea!  That is crazy!"
Ree: "It's even the same spelling, with no "e""
Ann Marie "Yeah, I've had quite a time changing my name this summer without the hypen in there."
Ree: opens the Charlie book
Ree: "Who's Wallace?"
Ann Marie: "He's my dog, I don't have any kids...so he's the next best thing."
Ree: "What kind of dog"
Ann Marie "He's a cute little beagle mix."
Ree: "That's great!"
Ree & Ann Marie: taking one picture that was a fail and then one better one

Ann Marie & Ann Marie

Here's how the the commentary running through my head went, illustrated in purple:

Ree: opens her cook book to page where my name is 
Ree: "You're name is Ann Marie?  Mine too!?"
Ann Marie: "Oh my gosh, I had no idea!  That is crazy!" OMG, now she thinks that I don't read her blog and I'm some kind of creep getting my book signed because I watch the Food Network or something!?
Ree: "It's even the same spelling, with no "e"" Seriously Ann Marie, how could you have missed this one?
Ann Marie "Yeah, I've had quite a time changing my name this summer without the hypen in there." Honestly Ann Marie, WHAT ARE YOU DOING? Why in the WORLD would she give a donkey's behind about your silly issues with your name change??
Ree: opens the Charlie book
Ree: "Who's Wallace?"
Ann Marie: "He's my dog, I don't have any kids...so he's the next best thing." And now she thinks I'm a weirdo because I'm having her sign a book for my dog.  Holy crap, I am a weirdo, what am I doing??
Ree: "What kind of dog"
Ann Marie "He's a cute little beagle mix." I am so nervous I could puke, why am I sweating?
Ree: "That's great!"
Ree & Ann Marie: taking one picture that was a fail and then one better one
Ann Marie: Oh my goodness.  I totally forgot to ask her about Marlboro Man, among everything else.  I wonder if I can turn around and go back and ask?  Oh man, there is a security guard packing heat there that will probably take me down if I try to turn around and ask.  CRAP.

As you can see, while my intentions were there.  But, the execution was extremely poor.  Dangit all to dog biscuits.

Maybe the next time that she comes to the Minneapolis, I can just cut to the chase and give her a letter with my "thanks" instead of acting like a freak-o-la.

Or, maybe I'll get just as mental and sweaty as I did this time.  Oh man.

Mrs. Captain Crunch?

You know how that school yard taunt went, "well if you love it so much, why don't you marry it?".  As a kid growing up I always thought that was such a stupid saying. But today I found myself wondering if that might not be such a bad idea.  Because I'm addicted to Cap'n Crunch.

Once I have one bite, I can't stop.  It's salty.  No wait SWEET.  No it's CRUNCHY.  Mehhhh...my mouth hurts and the roof of my mouth is bleeding!  Hold up...or are those my tastebuds being put into overhaul? 

While I'm trying to figure out which it is, why not have yet ANOTHER bowl of Cap'n Crunch?

Back to original question.  I mean, if Captain Crunch were an actual navy man that led the charge on crunchy, salty, sweet goodness...is there a possibility that I could marry him?  While I thought at first this might be a spectacular idea, the more research that I did, the more that I thought marrying an imaginary cereal superhero might not be such a good idea.

What does "Crunch-a-tize me" even mean?

1. First of all, I found out his real name.  It's Horatio Magellan Crunch and his current job is "Commander of Crunch" for Quaker Oats Company.  No this is not made up and he actually has a facebook page.  While his full name demands respect, he comes across as being kind of lazy and markets himself as "Cap'n Crunch".  For me, that is just not going to cut it.  I need a man that speaks proper English and is proud of his name and heritage.
2. Horatio is definitely my senior, being born in 1963.  While my hubby is two years old than me and I have no issue with people dating older or younger...a few years is different than a few decades.
3. Chances are good that the Cap'n has a life supply of his namesake's cereal.  In turn, that means that I would eventually have so many cavities that the need for full mouth dentures would be required.  In addition to that, I would weigh a metric ton.
4. On Family Guy, they portrayed him as a cereal killer...and I just don't have time to get caught up in all of that drama or legal hassle.

So for now it looks like the Cap'n will have to wait.  But in the meantime, I've found some recipes for you that looked WAY too good not to mention:

Cap'n Crunch Recipes
Cap'n Crunch French Toast by The Hungry Housewife
Cap'n Crunch Cookies by Miss in the Kitchen
Cap'n Crunch Cupcakes with Peanut Butter Marshmallow Frosting by Confessions of a Cookbook Queen
Cap'n Crunch Chicken Tenders by Jennifer Richmond on SHEKNOWS

Wallace's Ruff Week

Wallace has had a pretty ruff week and a half.  Between naps and meals, he's had some other occurrences that proved to be the bain of existence.

Forget the Treat, this is a TRICK
As I mentioned on facebook, Wallace found trick-or-treating very confusing and against everything he stands for.  First, people in strange outfits with flashlights come in our yard and we proceeded to open the door for them. Then, they say one of the only recognizable words in his four word vocabulary,"treat" and they THEY get the candy. He thought the whole thing sucked and that it was a pretty raw deal.

Doglight Savings Time

Since Sunday our dog has been been even lazier than normal (if that is even possible).  He doesn't get it and all that he knows is that his internal clock is seriously out of whack.

Party Lines

Unfortunately for Wallace, our house is next door to a polling location SIDERANT: ours is at a church.  Ever wondered why we vote where we pray?   Click here in case you're interested in reading a great piece about it!  Since the traffic starting at 6:30 AM and ending at 8:00 PM was crazy, little pooch was not allowed outside without strict supervision and his standard walking agenda was severely affected by us, and our neighbor's, civic duties.

Where do you think you guys are going at 6:45 in the morning?  Walking?  No?  What does voting mean?

Pupcorn Mayhem
Wallace would make the worst hunting dog on the face of the earth since he nearly pees himself whenever he hears anything that sounds remotely like fireworks or gunshots.  So, you can imagine the scene that occurs in our household when I want to make my one of my favorite things in the world, homemade popcorn on the stove.  

When I went to make popcorn this week I was really excited to use one of our wedding presents, a non-stick ceramic pot.  After the popping was done and the kitchen was filled with the amazing popcorn smell, I slid the pot off the stovetop.  BOOM!!.  And I don't mean "BOOM" like the popcorn that I made was amazing...I mean "BOOM" as in the ceramic pot exploded right in front of me and Wallace.  He beelined to the nearest corner and shook for about a half an hour.

Sorry to whoever gave this to us for a our wedding!  Opps!

Since I had just taken the pot out of the original package, I referred back to the instructions to see if there was anything that I had missed.  Turns out that a ceramic pot that is microwave, oven and dishwasher safe....does not mean that it is stovetop safe. So back to square one with our old pot.

On a high note, he learned how to catch popcorn in his mouth after we made a new batch!

Friday Houdini Fiasco
Well, not exactly sure why or what possessed him to do this...but...Wallace escaped his kennel on Friday.  Luckily our neighbor recognized the sad looking little beagle limping around the park howling his buns off at 3:00 in the afternoon and brought him to her house to call us.

In the process of escaping, Wallace injured his front paw.  I was genuinely concerned about it and was planning on taking him in on Monday...the next incident happened this morning.

Big Buck Hunter
While raking leaves hungover this morning, a four point buck strolled into our yard.  Imagine my shock when our "injured" dog that has been hobbling around for 24 hours went into a dead sprint and proceeded to chase a buck through our yard, into the park and then multiple blocks while Adam screamed his lungs off.

In closing, it's pretty hard to have sympathy for this gimp after witnessing the big buck hunter scene. 

Why You Should Vote Tomorrow

I don't give a flying hoot who you vote for, but, you sure as heck better vote tomorrow. And after hearing a myriad of excuses over the last few months, I made a small list of reasons that I think that everyone should:

1.) Do you like to complain?  

Then voting is a great way to ensure that for the next four years, you have that right.  If you don't, then you sure as heck can keep your mouth shut until the next election since you made the decision to not to do anything about it and sit on the couch.

2.) To beat the stereotypes of people under 30.

Do your parents and grandparents think that you don't have a clue about what is going on in the world?  Then prove them wrong, take some time to research your candidates and do your civic duty to shut them up.

3.) Do you care about someone that does or could get access to public funding?  

For example, do you know someone that might benefit from Breast Cancer or HIV/AIDS research?  Well, a lot of those programs get federal or state funding.  By voting for candidates that support your causes, you're helping to make sure that your causes are considered.

4.) Do you have any idea how ridiculous the general public is?  

There is a reason that candidates are spending money on those silly negative commercials.  Because there are TONS of people out there that believe them!  Yeah, I know.  It might sound ridiculous but it's true.  While I know that it might seem like you're just canceling someone's vote, at least you're doing that!

5.) It's your money.  

Chances are that you pay thousands of dollars a year out of your paycheck in taxes.  So why wouldn't you help to ensure that your money isn't being p*ssed away?

6.) Do you have kids, ever want to have kids or have grandkids?  

Well, where do you think that decisions are made for education programs, school budgets, teachers unions, daycare regulations and school lunch programs?  Turns out it's primarily by the local, state and federal government that WE put into office.

7.) Do you know a Veteran? 

While some veterans don't mind either way if you vote or not and I even personally know multiple veterans that don't exercise their right to vote for various reasons, their VA benefits are provided by the government.  Which means that our government decides what they get.  Shouldn’t you have enough civic duty in you to take some time to vote for people that you feel are going to ensure that veterans get good healthcare and pay?  

If you're still reading this that you probably saw something that made you think you should vote tomorrow.  But it turns out that you're only half way there and don't know where to start.  So let's continue with the most common excuses that I could think of with some solutions.

But I'm Too Busy To Learn About Politics This Late

What is that?  You say that you're too busy and you don't want to "waste" a vote?  Well, then take 30 minutes to look at your candidates websites tonight and decide who you think most accurately represents your causes and ethics…and who you would trust with your wallet.  At the end of the day, that is what the large majority of America does so don't feel bad.  So instead of sitting on Facebook or Pintrest tonight, why not find out a little bit about your candidates and take the time to vote tomorrow?

But I Don't Know My Candidates

Well, luckily I've found a few resources that will help sum it up.  Essentially you type in your address and it spits out your options on candidates.  Then you can go to their website to see what their agenda looks like.   Or even better, google them and see what others are saying after checking out their website. 

Find My Candidates in Minnesota (by address) 

Find My Candidates in Wisconsin (by address)

But I Don't Know Where to Vote Tomorrow

Not sure of where to vote or what you need to bring?  Luckily I've found some sites that you punch in your address and then give you your nearest voter location: 

Where to vote in Minnesota

Where to vote in Wisconsin

But I Still Can't Figure it Out

I'm putting a unique offer on the table.  If you have read this, went through all of the steps and for whatever reason you can't figure out who your candidates are, what you need to bring to the poll or where your local poll is, PLEASE  email me at annmariescupoftea(at)gmail.com.  I will be watching my email all day and will provide you with a list of your full list of candidates, where to vote, and what you need to bring to the polling location.

So, a big "THANK YOU" to everyone that is going to be going out to the polls tomorrow!  As to those of you that are making the choice not to vote, I challenge you to think long and hard about why you won't be partaking in something that millions of other people across the world wish that they had the right to do.

Can you think of other good reasons that people should vote?  Do you have a good reason that you won't be voting?  I encourage comments!

Operation Fridge Was a Success!

I was going through my blog post history and realized that I never said if I had kept off the pounds for two months in order to win my French double door fridge...

Well, I did people!  I lost the 15+ pounds and kept it off for more than two months (now six months).  While my hubby hasn't ponied up yet on the French double door fridge, there are some architectural issues that came between me and my dream fridge.  Namely, the spot where our current fridge stands is too narrow and too shallow for my dreamboat fridge.  Which means that a kitchen renovation will be necessary to install my dream fridge.  Yeah, that is not going to happen right.  

SO while my fridge dreams are currently on hold, I'll live.  Turns out that it really isn't as bad as I thought it was that most of my issues had to do with sharing a fridge with roommates versus having a crappy fridge.

The Social Security Administration, Wowsers

 When I started the name change process after getting married, I thought the Social Security Administration trip would be the worst.  Boy was I wrong.  After my trip there this week, I'm wondering why they don't have a reality show and give a shot at trying to create a revenue stream for those of us that have NO hope of ever receiving benefits in our lifetime.

The trip started out with driving into the ghettos of Minneapolis.  After doing a few laps in a packed parking lot, I was finally on my way in.  The only thing between me and my disgusting wait was the metal detector.  So I took off my earring and necklace, put my purse in the bucket and went through.  The security officers were in shock.  From what they said, apparently that never happens there.  I knew that I was in for some good sh*t after that.

After punching in my social security number on a large touch screen with my back to a row of 20 complete strangers and likely some criminals looking at the same screen, I took a seat in their luxurious waiting area.  The SSA's luxurious waiting area is conveniently chalked full of amenities and features like: 

• ergonomic metal prison chairs
• solitude (no need to worry about things like windows, fresh air or circulation)
• digital informational messaging throughout your stay (featuring movie stars!)  See my favorite video here.
• a man with raggy clothes sleeping in the corner....that mysteriously never gets called

Then there are the classy cliental that frequent the Social Security Administration.  Within five minutes of sitting down, the following exchange occurred after an overweight 65 year old woman wearing a 1989 Mickey Mouse sweatshirt beeped going through the metal detector:

Security Officer: "Mam, could you go back to spot where the tape line is and walk back through the metal detector please?"

Bertha: Begins grabbing at the bottom of her sweatshirt and starts pulling her top off while saying "Do you want to frisk me and violate me!?  Go ahead!?"

Security Officer: "Mam, that won't be necessary.  There is no reason to get upset".

Bertha:  "Do you want to violate me, just go ahead!?"

Security Officer: "Mam, that won't be necessary, please put your shirt back on".

After seeing a lot more of Grandma than I had bargained for at 2:00 PM in a public place on a Wednesday, I was thankful that this particular Security Officer had advanced negotiation skills.  He successfully talked her into keeping her top on.

While I wish that was the only body part that I didn't wish to see that day...it wasn't.  

Photo from www.winningateverything.com

During my hour while waiting from number N121 to 185, I saw and smelled the following:

• A couple that smelled like they hadn't showered in three and a half weeks doing a drug deal over the phone
• The same couple talk to each other about their half way house experience and how it was way better than going into rehab
• Multiple people's stomach's that I never ever needed to see
• An Asian girl sporting a copycat of a Beauxbaton School of Magic outfit (but pink). She even had some kind of a hat on!

• And last but not least.  Two of the most disgusting female plumber's cracks that I've ever seen.  Actually, one of them was more of a "moon" than a "plumber's crack" based on the real estate I was privy to.  And if that wasn't nasty enough, it had some kind a rash all over it.  I dry heaved for you yesterday, don't worry.

And while I wish that I didn't have to hear from Bertha again that day (the aspring elderly topless dancer)...that would be an incorrect assumption.  

SIDERANT: Lately I've been noticing that I have the uncanny ability to quickly pick out which people in a crowd will be voting "no" to our upcoming amendment on requiring photo ID to vote.  Well...I was right in this case and had her immediately pegged as a "no" during the metal detector/violation scene.

So, after sitting her plus-sized stripper buns down on the plush metal bench, Bertha let it be known to everyone around her how RIDICULOUS it was that people be required to present photo identification to vote and that if we let his amendment to happen, the government will require anything that they want next year and eventually women won't be able to vote again.

SIDERANT: So no matter your political party or cause, while I can't imagine that this office is a cross section of our nation, I am pretty sheltered and have a feeling that for the most part...this group is indeed our general public.  Congratulations.  This is the same general public that in a few short weeks...will be voting alongside you.  So get your buns out and vote!

But wait, there's more.  When I finally got to window #14, I found out some more shocking news. Guess who has an incorrect name recorded with the social security office that didn't match any other government issued identification that she had?????  You guessed it, the chick that has two first names...me.  Luckily it wasn't too big of an issue and after showing him six different credit cards and types of identification he changed it within the government records instead of making me go through any hassle.  But I really need to talk with my parents about this!  None of my government issued identification has matched yet!

All and all, while the whole thing was a rather interesting experience at the end of the day I completed what I set out to.  I began the process to get my married name!  Thank you to all of the kind employees at the SSA that were kind and helpful that day and I'm sorry that you have to work with crazy people!!!